This week’s blog is brought to you by Ching-Han Wan & Gareth Kolze-Jones from our Technologies team….
Word on the (Regent) street is that it’s not what it does, but what it stands for. Some of the avid Apple fans we spoke to as the doors opened at 5pm had queued up outside the store for as long as 29hours! To put into context, in that time I had slept twice, enjoyed five square meals (interspersed with *ahem* snacks) and bombarded my colleagues with innumerable tenuous puns, but for these guys, it’s all about living the brand.
School kids, office workers and app developers were all prepared to brave the hustle and bustle (on occasion there was a lot more bustle than hustle) to be among the first to get their hands on Apple’s thinner, faster, sleeker iPad. But why? Not because of what it can do, but because of what it says about them; It says they’re modern. It says they’re trendy. It says they’re cool.
There’s an interesting point here – the point that if we believe in a brand strongly enough, we are prepared to go to extreme lengths to maintain that connection. It’s the same principles as monogamy – if you already have an iPhone and iPod, you shall stay faithful to your fair lady, Apple, and not cheat on her with any other tablets.
So why not the Samsung Galaxy Tab, Motorola Xoom, or HTC Flyer? Is it the iOS or the work of Jonathan Ive? Simple answer, neither. A large majority of the people we spoke to admitted that the reason they were there was because it gave them that ‘special feeling’, a Je ne sais quois, the X Factor. This is all heart-warming stuff, but we think it’s fair to assume that hype of this magnitude for a single product launch is the exclusive property of the world of technology.
The question need be asked, how do technological brands continue to draw so much buzz around its product launches? Simple; Legacy. The most successful brands create a series of products that have their own cache to the point where as Vince from Birmingham (who had queued up for the iPad for 22 hours) said: “yes it’s over-priced, but I’ve got an iPod touch, I’ve got an iPhone 4, so it makes sense for me to have an iPad to keep up with Apple.”
There might be no jaw-dropping revelation here, no earth-shattering epiphany to shake the world of brand development to its core, but the question worth asking here is; are you innovating or are just creating another piece of the wardrobe?
It’s been said before, Webmongs, but work really is like being at school. I turned up to the daily grind on Wednesday having run out of hairwax (regular readers will recall Web Curios’ previous unsuccessful attempts to solicit brand gifts of icecream, whisky and meths – in case anyone from Toni & Guy is reading this, I favour Label M products, fyi), and as a result looking more like this than my usual Shockheaded Peter ’style’. Anyone would think that I had turned up casually wearing the carcass of a recently butchered child as an overcoat, such was the horror that greeted me; so much so that my adorable colleagues in the CPG team felt compelled to force some hair product on me and make me wear it. Thanks, girls: way to boost a social inadequate’s self esteem!
Obviously this INCREDIBLE STORY pales into insignificance before the (real, no cynicism) incredible tale of those blokes in the mine. You can read about it elsewhere, and doubtless you already have, but my favourite thing about the remarkable tale (aside from the number of conversations I’ve had where people have speculated as to how friendly they will have become with each other during those long, lonely hours in the dark – there really is no link I can put in there that won’t offend someone, sadly) was the joyful email we here at H&K towers received from a Chilean colleague, which finished with the beautiful, sweary exclamation of joy “VAMOS CHILE MIERDA!!”. You’ve got to love a country where the accepted exclamation of national pride contains a swear.
I was away. Now I am back. Try and contain your joy (I know it’s hard, but for Christ’s sakes show some backbone, will you?).
So when we last spoke I was about to go on holiday here – unfortunately, I ended up somewhere that looks a lot more like here. It all went to tits, webmongs, and frankly it’s still a bit raw and painful. Suffice it to say that I will not be buying the US Department of Homeland Security a Christmas card this year.
Oh, who am I trying to kid? I totally failed to go on holiday and spent a week slumped in front of the (really, really mediocre) football, dulling my frontal lobes with drink and drugs in an attempt to numb the pain as big salty tears trickled down my cheeks. England could well jam their way to winning the World Cup, forcing me to emigrate. The weather may be nice, but I’m a wageslave officemonkey who’s chained to his desk for hours at a time so I can’t enjoy it. And I’m obviously not at Glastonbury. Modern Life Is Rubbish, and so is the blog this week. Suck it up.
Webmongs! In a show of MASSIVE DEFIANCE I am today saying XXXX XXX (use your nous and creativity to establish exactly which expletive I am masking behind those cunning Xs) to my workload and instead channeling all my energies into bringing you some stuff off the web. You hear that, The Man? YOU HEAR THAT???? Eh? Oh.
Strangely enough, The Man’s ambivalence to my defiance is pretty analogue to my feelings about the new toy for grown-ups which has been launched today (as an aside, may I just quote the ever-wonderful Saul Williams here and reference the conspiracy-theorists’ anti-Apple belief…”no one seems to recognize the symbols come to life / The bitten apple on the screen, and Jesus had a wife…”…JUST SAYING, is all) – for a full, unexpurgated viewpoint click here (WARNING – BAD WORDS).
For those of you, though, who are fully intending to line Steve Jobs’ pockets even further and sit about stroking your new i-pets to the appreciative breathy moans of your i-onanist colleagues, can I suggest that you all get the Scrabble app, which is the best thing I’ve yet seen on the iPad. Apart, actually, from a demo of the Telegraph’s forthcoming app, which looks very shiny indeed (it won’t actually make reading the news any better, but it will make it prettier – and that’s what counts, eh? I despair, I really do).
Anyway, enough bitter misanthropy. Or maybe not; we’ll see how we go.
Webmongs, I won’t lie to you – I am having what fat, sweaty policemen from 1970s detective shows would legitimately refer to as ‘a rough one’ (quite possibly whilst mopping their sweaty forehead with a gingham handkerchief – repeated attempts to find an image to accompany this phrase have proved fruitless, but I can now safely say that I do not recommend Googling “fat sweaty police chief” with Safe Search turned off).
Despite this, my dedication to bringing you the very best some stuff I found online this week continues unwavering. Not least because this post marks the 10th anniversary of this (in)glorious experiment in exactly how much rubbish one can get away with churning out in the name of ‘work’. That’s right – you’ve now had 10 weeks of this crap. It probably feels like longer.
To celebrate this momentous milestone, I would like to run a competition. That’s right, YOU CAN WIN A PRIZE. Just leave a comment at the bottom of this post, telling me something interesting. The person who posts the thing which I like best will win…a book. One of my books, to be precise (I’ll try and make an appropriate choice depending on who it is). I might even throw in some other stuff too, depending on what I’ve got knocking around at home.
I’ve just reread that – effectively what I’m offering you is a random choice of second-hand novel and possibly some other miscellaneous, used tat. This is a rubbish competition. Sorry.To make up for this, here’s some links and words:
I’d thought about trying to compose something pithy and insightful for the opening section this week, but frankly all I can think of is the upcoming 4-day weekend. It’s times like this that I’m particularly grateful to Jesus for riling up the Romans and getting himself nailed to a tree (as with all the good stuff on here, that line’s courtesy of someone better than me – in this case, the late, great Douglas Adams). Freedom, webmongs, sweet freedom (or at least the transitory illusion of freedom, which frankly is pretty much all any of us can hope for, with our useless arts degrees and a future of interminable wage-slavery ahead of us). To celebrate, I give you THE LIFE OF CHRIST IN CATS (one of the finest things ever to appear in Viz):
A plate depicting the life of Christ through the medium of cats. No more, no less.
Anyway, feline frippery aside, here’s this week’s offerings…:
[NB - if you're strapped for time, can I just suggest that you go straight to the last video and watch it. 23 seconds you won't regret. Obviously if you've got time then read everything as it's all...well, pretty mediocre, frankly]
You! Yes, you! Welcome, once again (presuming that you’ve been here before – if you’ve stumbled across this whilst searching for pornography then I apologise in advance for the lack of nudity but offer you a sincere first-timers’ welcome) to Web Curios.
God, that was a desperately poor intro. Sorry. What can I say? It’s Friday afternoon, and I’ve spent the entire week feeling a bit hungover under the weather. Not to mention the impact on my mood that this has had. It’s hard sometimes being a webmong (as you will well know). Nonetheless, I am putting my personal feelings of exhaustion and ennui to one side to bring you another selection of stuff I found online this week that one or two of you could conceivably find moderately interesting.
(It should be apparent by now that I am not a salesman).
We begin, this week, with a video – If you do nothing else here this week, watch this. It’s 5 minutes long, and is by far and away the best description I have yet seen of how virality works. Ignore the scaremongering undertones, and just think about how the meme below spreads. Oh, and for the non-geeks among you, a quick explanation of what 4chan is – you know all the stuff that features on those lists of the ‘biggest viral sensations EVER’? Stuff like RickRolling, the Numa Numa kid, Chocolate Rain and YouTube Porn Day? They all start at 4chan (WARNING – that link is direct to 4chan; the landing page is safe but I take no responsibility for what you might find beyond that (clue: porn and swearing)). It’s…just mental, really. Anyway, the video….
Oh Nestle… – Other ’social media gurus/mavens/experts/(insert meaningless title of your choice)’ will do this at length over the next few hours / days, but it doesn’t take a genius to work out that the tone of Nestle’s reponses to comments on their Facebook page probably didn’t do them any favours… Of course, as my esteemed colleague Dan Leach pointed out, it could all be very clever work by Greenpeace…
Twitter Announces @anywhere – Ok, so what this is (massively simplified) is Twitter’s next step in terms of integrating itself with other, 3rd party websites. The TechCrunch piece linked to in the title is a decent overview (and this is a shorter one)- what it doesn’t seemingly touch on, though, is the potential implications for the development of a ‘universal’ online identity. Could this be a first step into the creation of a one login / username culture, integrated across all platforms? The BBC’s announcement yesterday of greater integration with both Facebook and Twitter would suggest it could be…Oh, and at the same time Twitter also declared that it wanted to be ‘A Force For Good’. Isn’t that nice? And…er…haven’t we heard that before somewhere?
I WANT THIS TABLE IN OUR OFFICES. IN THE UNLIKELY EVENT THAT SOMEONE IMPORTANT IS READING THIS, CAN YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN PLEASE? THANKS.
What a magazine on the iPad might look like- Women’s digital magazine Viv put together this shiny demo, showcasing how their content might work on an iPad. My first thoughts? Content for people who really enjoyed Sin Citybut who don’t actually like reading very much.
Skittles for Valentine’s Day – Part of the ongoing trend in giving people real-life (cool) stuff in exchange for engagement with brands on social media (see also the Marmarati)
And, to finish (I know, I know, tldr), this week’s video selection:
1)Losers – ‘Flush’ feat Riz MC & Envy: Great track, great video and Envy is set to be huge this year (obviously if she isn’t then I never said that)
2) I went to see this lot on Tuesday. Great gig, though I did actually cause someone to leave the venue towards the end. In the unlikely event that you ever read this: sorry, Annoying Pair of Girls, but you were really getting on my tits:
3) The Internet of Things: how the planet is developing a central nervous system. 5 minutes of frankly insane futurology here from IBM:
4) Finally, a music video of near-Gaga levels of insanity. WHY THE SELLOTAPE???
Hello, webmongs. Happy Friday and all that. As I write, it’s 11:52am and it would appear that EVERYONE on the internet is watching the Beyonce / Lady Gaga lipstick-lesbian product placement extravaganza (otherwise known as the promo for new single ‘Telephone‘). I’m not, though. I am slaving over a hot keyboard to bring you a random, disconnected bunch of rubbish from the internets. SEE MY STAKHANOVITE DEDICATION AND WONDER.
I won’t lie to you, webmongs, it’s been a week of tribulations – who knew babyfaced pop-moppet Mark Owen even had a penis, let alone that he was sharing it with people who weren’t his partner? Shocking. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway, let’s get this thing started shall we? The sooner I crack on, the sooner I can start taking furtive sips from the bottle of advocaat I keep hidden under my desk.
SXSW and the ‘Check-In Wars’ – Ok, so ‘wars’ is maybe a little hyperbolic. Nonetheless. SXSW is a 9-day festival covering ‘interactive’, music and film, which takes place in Austin, Texas each year. Basically it’s a great big hipster / techy love-in, populated by the sort of people who only buy music that’s been endorsed by Pitchfork (full disclosure: I am a bit like that). The ‘interactive’ portion is all about new tech and innovation, and ‘features five days of compelling presentations from the brightest minds in emerging technology, scores of exciting networking events hosted by industry leaders and an unbeatable line up of special programs showcasing the best new websites, video games and startup ideas the community has to offer’. Apparently.
Anyway, this year the pre-festival buzz has centred on the growing competition between Foursquare and Gowalla, the two companies currently dominating the world of location-based mobile apps. In the unlikely event that you are reading this and don’t know what they are, read this.
Given the fact that everyone in the Western world is likely to have a smartphone of sorts within the next 24 months, a lot of money is being wagered on location-based apps being the next big thing. This week, both the major playors announced new features – Foursquare plugging its analytics tools that will allow businesses to see who is checking in and when, meaning that they can better tailor their promotions to match their customers; and Gowalla integrating pictures and comments to its check-in service adding an extra layer of sociability to the platform. Whilst Foursquare’s currently winning in terms of users, it will be interesting to see the competition playing out over the next few months.
Oh, and you may not believe that these things are ever going to catch on with real people (ie those who aren’t Soho-dwelling generic media wankers), but the fact that Facebook is set to also allow users to share their location should give you pause for thought. This stuff will go mainstream, honest.
AOL Launches ‘Lifestream’ – Another big trend for the coming months that trendspotters (people with sharp haircuts, sharper glasses and dust where their souls should be) have been banging on about of late is convergence – that is, a move towards integrating your different online platforms and identities in order to make them easier to manage. We’ve already seen this with Facebook, MySpace,LinkedIn, etc, all allowing you to synch your status updates with your Twitter account – AOL’s ‘Lifestream’ is an attempt to create a standalone platform that integrates feeds from ALL your social networks into one place. It’s an interesting concept – not sure if AOL has the clout to make it stick, but again something else which we’ll see more of in coming months.
ANOTHER social app: Plancast – This is worth knowing about, if only because it’s an interesting proposition. Rather than an app that lets you share what you are doing now, Plancast is designed to help you share what you will be doing in the future – basically a social planner app. Really simple, but there’s a gap for exactly that sort of service right now.
Lewis Hamilton’s Secret Life – What do you think Lewis Hamilton does in his spare time? Discusses Baudrillard with his suspiciously transgender-looking girlfriend? Contemplates the theoretical beauty of Euler’s Identity? Stares into space as lonely tears course down his cheeks? Nope, none of those. What he in fact does, according to the new Alternate Reality Game for Reebok which launched this week, is recover stolen artworks like some sort of masculine Lara Croft. I’m frankly puzzled by both the backstory and mechanic for this – I’m a fan of ARGs, but this use of Lewis feels a bit bolted on, frankly, and I’m still unclear as to the link back to the brand.
Attach Digital Content to Barcodes – Bit hard to explain, this, but bear with me. This service allows you to attach digital content to any barcode – that means that if someone scans the barcode with their smartphone, having downloaded the StickyBits app, their phone will automatically take them to the webpage associated to that barcode. So, for example, you could link the Lady Gaga video mentioned all the way up there to the barcode on the CD single – meaning anyone who scanned the barcode with their iPhone could watch the video immediately. Now think about the fact that you can create your own unique barcodes, link them to whatever you want, print them out, stick them to things…the possibilities are huge, particularly for guerilla marketing campaigns.
Raising Awareness Of, And Funds For, he Homeless in NYC – a great piece of creative highlighting the plight of the homeless. As someone pointed out to me, though, it is horrendous that people are more likely to interact with a virtual homeless person than give money to a real one.
1) Last weekend the lead singer of one of my favourite bands, Sparklehorse, committed suicide. Mark Linkous was a very, very talented musician – here’s a small example of that talent:
2) To lighten the mood, watch as infinite teddybears invade Worthing sea front (by the amazing Cyriak):
